This post is a response to Dodie Clarks video with Hazel Hayes about oversharing online (I’m also adding on to the points made)
I get what dodie means by saying that oversharing has its good and bads. For those unaware I have an Instagram fandom account that actually has a decent amount of followers on and I’m also following over 5 thousand people so I see a lot of what people post and from what I’ve seen a lot of the people I see aren’t always in the best of places (and neither am I at times) and sadly a lot of what I see is people sharing their emotions online. It sucks but I can also see why they do it. A lot of people don’t have a fully supporting life in the ‘real’ world and online is their chance to escape. They can say pretty much whatever they are feeling and won’t be judged for it. They can also get help from friends and others if they wish. For them it’s better than keeping it locked up. I’ve been on probably both ends of this situation. The one in need of help and the one looking and reading the post. So I know how easy it can be to pick up your phone, log onto a social media site and start ranting about how you feel at your absolute lows.
I think the reason people do do this is to feel wanted and that they have a support system if need be. And I’ve also noticed people can be very explicit in what they are feeling. With friends a lot of the time I’ll be texting/messaging them and then I’ll check their account or story and see that they’re in a complete melt down. And it’ll go through my mind “why the hell haven’t they brought this up?” This is where I agree with what Hazel was saying by it hurts to know one of your best friends is suffering in the room next to you and they went to bed fine. It’s obviously a little different but it’s the same message. I feel like a completely failed friend when that happens and like I haven’t done enough to help them. But that can also bring you down. You feel uneasy and that there is nothing you can truly do to stop them feeling that bad. It’s sucks. But I know it helps them and if they wanted my help sure,y they would ask.
When I’ve spoken about how I’ve felt I’ve sometimes got a few people telling me they know how I feel and that what I’m feeling is okay. It does help as bad as I am at telling them. But when it’s me. In the heat of the moment I will pick up my phone and start sharing because that’s the way I’ve learnt to cope with everything. That’s how I’ve learnt to deal with what’s going on but I also know how damaging it is to me and others around and following me. I try and see myself as a honest but positive person . So sharing about what’s going on in my head is the worst of the worst. Especially in the moment. I tend to wake up the next morning and look at the messages I’ve collected from worried or anxious people and read what I wrote and think “what the hell was I going on about”. But I’ve also realised I share way too much with friends that I shouldn’t and I’m not sharing enough with the friends who can actually do something for me.
I think I’ve really got to stop oversharing online when I’m at my worst and see how I feel in the morning before jumping into panic mode. Things do look better after you sleep they really do. So that’s my tip for you. I’ll also link dodies video if you feel like watching it. But quick message to dodie:
Share as much as you think is healthy but helpful. Like a salad almost with salt. Enough for flavour but not too much so it becomes disgusting. I personally am okay with what you share. I do worry about you but I’ve seen you get through a lot so I know you’ll be able to get through it and you do have a friend group that will help you. If you want to share online then do it. It does help me and so many others and I know some people can’t look at the stuff you post but again it’s up to you. Love you (:
So what do you think about the whole situation? Do you over share online too much? Do you see others doing it? Do you think it’s healthy? Ttyl my krazies
Dodie and Hazels video on the issue: https://youtu.be/5flD8RcsZtY